Stop “Being Yourself”

One of the worst advice for success I have been given: “be yourself.” And you might be given this advice or have given it to someone else. Why is it bad? First of all, what does it mean to be yourself?

Life is about finding yourself and that is an arduous process–it takes time and effort. As you grow, you become aware of what makes you, YOU: your likes, dislikes, what makes you happy and what doesn’t, what certain issues make you feel. Every so often these change. If you want to be yourself, you try to cling on to these preferences even when new experiences change your perspective. However, you continue to change and hopefully improve as you age.

Life is an exploration of your passions. From our passions, we make goals and expectations about life. When we want to reach our dreams and follow our passions, we need self-improvement to hit those goals and have a healthy expectation in life. From there, you will see your current reality and decide what your future reality would be like. We have a problem in our current generation: We think that being ourselves is enough. We expect the world to, not only accept our current state but also, reward us for it because we were “being ourselves.” There are moments when a person is rewarded in a TV-show, a contest, a pageant, a competition, or a performance just because they were “being themselves” even when there is an obvious sign of mediocrity and inexperience. Then the people who actually train and excel are overlooked and brushed aside. We not only take away what people deserve but also elevate ourselves as being better than them. This kind of thinking stems from complacency, conceit, and egotism. If anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself.

So stop “being yourself.”

Then what should you be? The best advice you can give to someone, “become the best possible version of yourself.” You acquire humility and understand your place in society. From there, you start to reflect on the things you need to improve on. Continuous self-improvement, personal growth, and learning will become a way of life.

In short, be courageous!

My advice for success: Choose the road that forces you to confront yourself.

Seek people that will mentor us and point out our weaknesses. Take on what you think are impossible roles. You’ll learn that impossible is nothing, and better, that nothing is impossible.

It is not praise in which we seek but rather for improvement.